If Babies Wrote Poetry

Jenny Evans

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about my baby and what he’d say if he were able to pen his thoughts on paper. Preferably in verse form.

I Think I’ll Try to Eat This
A dry noodle from dinner the night before
Lies tantalizing upon the floor,
Good thing no one cleans this place anymore—
I think I’ll try to eat this.

A piece of dirt from your boot was flung,
It crumbles deliciously on the tongue,
There’s more to taste and the night is young—
I think I’ll try to eat this.

So much to explore and only one mouth:
A dusty raisin beneath the couch,
Wadded-up tissues from the trash,
Mom’s bathroom cabinet tampon stash,
A ladybug creeping along the wall,
Random hair tangled up in a ball—
I think I’ll try to eat this.
Yes, I think I’ll try to eat this.

*****************************
Gassy (a haiku)
Writhe in agony
Rattle windows with my screams
Fine now — just a fart.

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A Breastfeeding Limerick
Nursing in public is fun,
Especially since I’m almost one.
I’ll pull down the blanket,
Bite her nipple and yank it:
How else will she know when I’m done?


Head to the Family Room


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If Babies Wrote Poetry


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Jenny Evans is a writer, a night owl, a perfectionist, and a Mormon mother of five living in New England. When she isn't cleaning juice out of the carpet, she pokes fun at herself and chronicles her messy, crazy life raising a houseful of children at her blog Unremarkable Files.