How To Get Out In the Frozen Tundra With Your Toddler in 39 Easy Steps
Have you heard, it’s been snowing a bit in Boston! (And by a bit, I mean that basically that when people say “when hell freezes over,” I’m pretty sure they mean Boston this winter.) Kids have missed more days of school than there are snow days. (In fact, in Somerville where I live, they were enclosed the entire week before school vacation due to snow on roofs!) Sidewalks and parking spots have disappeared. Hell, entire vehicles have disappeared, trapped under several feet of snow and not to be seen again probably until June, cause that’s probably how long it will take for the snow to melt.
Aside from the fact that there is way more snow than there was, well, ever in all the time I have lived in Boston, having a toddler during this snowmageddon is really quite exhausting. (Man, if only I knew how easy I had it last winter when Eve was a newborn!) This is a little glimpse into my every day life for the next few months.
1. Get your diaper bag
2. Make sure that you have the requisite extra set of clothes, diapers, wipes and snack needed to leave the house with your toddler.
3. Realize the cheerios container is empty and refill it.
4. Redirect your toddler, who is emptying her clothing drawer, to the toys and books.
5. Grab your child’s hat, gloves and snowsuit from the entryway downstairs.
6. Reassure your toddler that you will be right back as she starts to cry because you have left her sight.
7. Repack the diaper bag that your toddler has managed to unpack in the time it took to grab her outerwear.
8. Remind her that she just ate breakfast and she can have a snack when you reach your destination as she pleads “Num num!” repeatedly while pointing to the cheerios container.
9. Put your toddler’s hat on.
10. Put your toddler’s hat back on after she takes it off.
11. Put on a glove.
12. Put on the other glove.
13. Put the first glove back on that she took off using her teeth.
14. Wrangle your toddler into her snowsuit.
15. Tell her how this isn’t fun for you either as she screams bloody murder.
16. Bring her downstairs to the entryway.
17. Realize you left the diaper bag upstairs and sprint back up to get it.
18. Put your boots on.
19. Pull your toddler away from the stairs she is now trying to scale in her slippery snowsuit.
20. Put your coat on.
21. Pull your toddler away from the stairs.
21. Put your hat on.
22. Pull your toddler away from the stairs.
23. Put your gloves on.
24. Pull your toddler away from the stairs.
25. Put on the carrier.
26. Place your toddler in the carrier.
27. Attempt to lengthen the straps which are too short to fit over your bulky winter coat.
28. Mutter expletives under your breath as you wiggle your arms in what appears to a very awkward-looking and decidedly unsexy rendition of the Macarena as try to grab the buckle of the carrier from behind your back that isjuuuuust out of reach.
29. Reposition your toddler who is now pushing herself away from you and trying to hang upside down and appears to be sweating a bit under the many layers.
30. Make sure that your toddler is strapped safely in the carrier.
31. Put your toddler’s hat, which has mysteriously fallen off, back on her head.
32. Grab your keys & leave the house.
33. Realize you left the diaper bag inside and go back in.
34. Replace your toddler’s hat again.
35. Double and triple-check that you have everything.
36. Leave the house and lock up behind you.
38. Look up the street to to see that you are missing the bus that is just now driving by.
39. Cry a little inside and count down how many days until spring.
In all seriousness, I’m very thankful that we’ve been safe and that I can walk places with Eve so that
I don’t lose my mind we can still get out and do things.
How has winter been for you?
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This post was syndicated with permission to BonBon Break Media, LLC.