Hey kids, don’t stick your tongue in there m’kay? by The Bearded Iris
Damn. Parenting is hard.
Every day is a veritable obstacle course of responsibilities and decisions.
And just when you feel like you’ve gotten one part of parenting down because nobody got a cavity this year or burned down the house with their new chemistry set, something else goes horribly wrong. It’s the Murphy’s Law of Parenting.
Like that time I finally decided to let my baby “cry it out” for the first time, only to discover he had a raging fever.
Or the time I chose to purposely stretch out my toddler’s immunization schedule and as a result he contracted the worst case of Chicken Pox my pediatrician had seen in twenty years.
Let’s face it, you just can’t put your kid in a bubble and protect them from every danger out there.
But at least I knew beyond the shadow of a doubt that my kids weren’t being exposed to BPA in their water bottles! That’s right, I finally plunked down the big bucks on fancy-schmancy stainless steel water bottles for all three of my children so they wouldn’t have to hydrate themselves with substandard plastic water bottles full of petrochemical-based carcinogens.
Only, the joke is on me, because according to the news recently, even those water bottles are putting my children at risk…of accidental death or dismemberment!
ABOUT LESLIE: Leslie Marinelli is a writer, wife, mother of three, toilet humor aficionada, and transplanted Pittsburgher trapped in the suburbs of Atlanta. She is the Editor-in-Chief of In The Powder Room and blogs at The Bearded Iris: A Recalcitrant Wife and Mother Tells All. Leslie is an Erma Bombeck Writers’ Workshop Humorist of the Month, a BlogHer Humor Voice of the Year for 2013 and 2012, and a Babble Top 100 Mom Blogger of 2011. She is also the editor and co-author of the #1 Amazon top-rated and best-selling women’s humor anthology, “You Have Lipstick on Your Teeth.” Connect with her on Facebook and Twitter @TheBeardedIris.
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