5 Tips to Survive a Best Friend Moving Away

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This post is sponsored by Kids Email

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We live in a small town. As a matter of fact, it is a small town on an island over an hour away from the mainland. It may sound isolated, but the community and friendships here make life full and are the reason my husband and I decided to plant our roots here over 17 years ago. We wanted to raise our kids here.

When we started our family, we knew their friendships would be really important. Community is wide, but friendship circles are tight.

I went to baby groups and library sessions, gymnastics and music. We did it all! Little did I know that these outlets for “friend finding” weren’t only for my kids, but for me as well.

My son quickly fell into a group of wonderful kids and their parents became our island family. Camping trips and off island excursions coupled with school events and sporting events created a euphoric state of connectedness.

…and then one family moved….and then another…and another. I knew the feelings I was having, but for my kids, it altered their universe. These were the people we did ALLTHETHINGS with every day. When the most recent group left, two of his best friends were moving away. His Lego Buddy AND his twin brother, the Stunt Man. Both boys were important pieces to my son’s friendship puzzle. It was time to pick myself up from my sad and weepy bootstraps and provide opportunities to help my kids find their center again.

Here are some of the ways we survived our best friends moving away:

1. Get yourself out there

Once you are cozy in a group, it is difficult to reach out and meet new people or remix with nice folks you have known from a distance, but you need to. Schedule a potluck at a park and invite lots of families. Stay for another game after your child’s game and cheer on the teams. Go to school and community functions. Be in the places where people mingle in your community.

2. Pull back in

What?! I know, I just told you to get out there. There is something about bringing the family together as well. Soon after our friends moved, I made it my summer goal to create opportunities for my kids to play together…alone. Guess what? By the end of the summer, they realized they were both a lot of fun. Yes, they still drive each other crazy, but they also seek one another out to play and there is a lot less screaming in our house. Build those friendships within your family, too.

3. New activities

We were fortunate to have some GREAT timing with the move. Our friends moved the weekend after school got out and summer camps were starting up. I enrolled my son in four different camps and he made some great new friends who had interests that were similar to his. Encourage your child to pursue one of hir or her interests in a school club or community activity.

4. Start a project

Nothing gets your mind off of things like a little work and sweat. Start a project with your kids. Involve them in the heavy lifting of family chores. Seeing a task or project through from start to finish is a huge pride builder and will give your child something to chat about and share with their new friends.

5. One is silver and the other’s gold

Remember that song “Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver and the other’s gold.”? While our friends moved away, they are still a part of our lives. While talking to their mom, we agreed that we would be Skyping often and we realized that all three boys were old enough to be introduced to email. WOW! They can send each other pictures and write one another notes! AWESOME!

As I went to sign up my son for a Gmail account, I realized that I had to sign out of my business account to switch over to his…and then the INBOX. Lord! Spam! UGH! There was no way I could just let my son loose on email. Too much information. WAY too much information.

The next day, I saw a new company to follow on Twitter, KidsEmail.org. Hmmm….this is intriguing. I could try it out for FREE. Nice. Next thing I knew I was signed up and I had an account created for my son. He could send an email – it would go to my inbox, I would send it forward to his intended recipient – his friend would receive it and respond and he was excited to get a response! One of the security settings allows the parent to control their contact list. You can control who they get email from! There is no more worrying about “those” types of spammy emails reaching my son’s inbox.

They have a kid-friendly interface for the log-in page:

…and for the inbox. (Plus it can be customized…think fairies, cars and more!)

PERFECT for a 7 year old. What about as they get older? All of the safe guards are optional and there is even a teen interface. I am sold. Check out their other features here.

Now he could correspond safely, whenever he wanted.

Overall, through many attempts to “make things right”, we learned that we can continue on, even when there are huge shifts in our world. Most of all, we know that we can always reach out to friends and family. It IS wonderful to have good friends in other places as well!