I didn’t hear the rest. Just stood there, clutching the phone, waiting for the floor to crack open and drop me into hell.

The girl was seven then, with a tangled mass of long brown hair the likes of which caused her to blanch at the sight of a brush and caused hairdressers to charge me double. Back then, I didn’t even know what lice was. All I knew was it was bad, very very bad. So bad that I flew straight past confusion, fear and all rational thought directly into panic.

Next thing I knew, I was being sucked into Google, staring at bug legs while scratching my head raw. I was furious, freaked out, frightened. Some absentee mother’s kid had infected mine and now I had no choice but to step up, and fast.

I yanked the poor child out of school, swore everyone in town to secrecy, begged the Lice Squad for advice. An hour later, I had the shakes, the sweats. This was War. I had to end the Bugs’ Life before they ended ours. But could I?

ABOUT MOMFAZE: Toronto freelance writer/editor Randi Chapnik Myers and social communicator Mara Shapiro blog for momfaze, a no-holds-barred site for parents of teens and tweens. Randi, who also writes for Today’s Parent, More magazine and the Globe & Mail, is proud to be an expert carpooler, a reluctant chef, and a hockey mom at StixandPux. Mara, a Community Manager for Our Kids Media and book reviewer on Be Nice or Leave Thanks, has a hard time wiping the smile off her face while trying to perfect the art of saying No to her three teenagers.

Follow them at www.momfaze.com as they stalk their kids online and live to write about it.

CONTINUE READING IN THE FAMILY ROOM

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The post How to Kill Lice and Have Fun Doing It by MomFaze first appeared on BonBon Break.

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Mom, I want to be on Facebook!

Here we go. Whether you’re dreading the day or not, no matter who or where you are, eventually, it’s coming. Some time between, say, 8 and 12, depending on maturity level and place in the family (yeah, my youngest was roaming around on there with just his family to talk to at 8 – what of it?), I can guarantee that your kid is Getting on Facebook, the Gateway to Getting Online for Good.

My take? It’s gonna happen, so stop trying to stop it and get yourself in on the fun.

WARNING: Don’t do this.

ABOUT MOMFAZE: Toronto freelance writer/editor Randi Chapnik Myers and social communicator Mara Shapiro blog for momfaze, a no-holds-barred site for parents of teens and tweens. Randi, who also writes for Today’s Parent, More magazine and the Globe & Mail, is proud to be an expert carpooler, a reluctant chef, and a hockey mom at StixandPux. Mara, a Community Manager for Our Kids Media and book reviewer on Be Nice or Leave Thanks, has a hard time wiping the smile off her face while trying to perfect the art of saying No to her three teenagers.

Follow them at www.momfaze.com and on Twitter @momfaze as they stalk their kids online and live to write about it.

CONTINUE READING IN THE FAMILY ROOM

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The post So Your Child Wants To Be On Facebook by Randi Chapnik Myers of MomFaze first appeared on BonBon Break.

What Are Your Teens Teaching You?

~:: Mara Shapiro from Momfaze ::~

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When we have babies, we wonder how we’re going to teach them everything they know. After all, kids are completely Tabula Rasa, blank slates. They come out of the womb with the instincts to survive- they know how to breathe, cry, pee, poop, and (hopefully) latch on to some kind of feeding apparatus. But, other than that, it’s up to us, their mommas (and papas) to give them the rest of the information and tools they’ll need to navigate the rest of their lives.

What we forget, however, is how much our babies will school us as they grow up.

Young children truly are amazing. By the time they are teens, they’ll have taught us so much: adaptability, creativity, resilience, patience. They’ll show us what friendship and love are really like, how to forgive and forget, how to be exuberant, and what love really is.

This learning, to me, is the absolute best part of being a mother.

Even though it’s sometimes sad for me to be past the stage where I might wake up with a tiny, warm body curled around me (unless it’s furry and smells like dog), it’s also amazing to have the opportunity to spend stolen moments with my almost-grown children. Because when I’m truly listening to what they’re saying, when I’m mindful of the nuances (or the obvious comments directed straight at me), I learn. They teach me.

And that is a very special thing. The best thing.

Lately, my children have shared some very important wisdom with me.

My daughter said to me, ‘I don’t want to hear you say your fat or you’re ugly. You aren’t supposed to say things like that in front of me.’ What she taught me: Be confident. Be mindful of what you’re saying and who you’re saying it in front of. Be a good example to those who you are responsible for influencing. Love yourself and be happy the way you are.’

My daughter said to me (yes, twice, she’s a very smart young woman), ‘Why do you talk about celebrities like you know them? You don’t know them or what they’re thinking or what is going on with them.’ I asked her, ‘Don’t you care when someone is acting stupid? Her reply, ‘When it affects me, I care. How do Taylor Swift’s boyfriend problems affect me?’ What she taught me: Mind your own business. Don’t gossip. Worry about things that are happening in your own life instead of troubling yourself with things you can’t do anything about or that don’t matter.

My son said to me, ‘Leave him be. He will find his own way’. (We were discussing my concerns about his younger brother’s social life.) What he taught me: People are who they are. You cannot change them. You can love them, you can guide them, but leave allow them to find their own way. A mother cannot control everything.

My youngest son said to me, ‘These days, kids have to take no responsibility. When the kid is rude to the teacher or doesn’t do their homework, they get their parents to blame the teacher for not doing a good job. Kids aren’t learning how to be accountable.’ (Yes, he knows that word. He reads a lot.) What he taught me: That kids are watching and observing at all times, and that they’re not stupid. They know the score, and exactly what they’re doing to manipulate their parents. That some people are willing to work for what they want and will stand by their convictions and that it’s worth doing so if you believe in them, even if the opinion is unpopular or will cause your life to be more difficult.

The same youngest said, ‘We have had an unconventional upbringing.’ What he taught me: That even though I’m not a perfect mother, and that I forget to hand in permission forms, and I don’t make hot lunches and I don’t know whose socks are whose and sometimes (often) I say no, they have still loved their childhoods. I learned you don’t have to be perfect to make happy kids.

Every day there’s more. Every single day my kids share their world views and provide me with opportunities to grow as a person. I know that obviously, if they’re this smart, I’ve done an ok job with this mothering thing. I’m not sure how much credit their father and I can take for their intuitiveness. Maybe it’s just good genes.

Who knows?

All I know is that teenagers are amazingly smart creatures. You should talk to one today.

What have your kids taught you?

ABOUT MARA: Mara Shapiro is living her dream as a social media Manager for a parenting and education resource in Canada.  She loves to cook, read, practice yoga, and write lots of words. She has been a featured guest on Bonbon Break, Blogher, Huffington Post life, CTV News Channel, and has been quoted about teenagers in Brighterlife.ca, The Toronto Star, and The Huffington Post. You can find her dishing about life with teenagers at momfaze.com and sharing book reviews and inappropriate slices of life at beniceorleavethanks.com.
To learn more, check out her about.me page. Ever so social, you can tweet her @chickymara, giggle with her on Facebook, and see her imaginary life on Pinterest.

Check out more of Mara’s work on Bonbon Break

CONTINUE READING IN THE FAMILY ROOM

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This post was written by Mara Shapiro of Momfaze and Be Nice or Leave. Thanks. exclusively for Bonbon Break Media, LLC

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The post What Are Your Teens Teaching You? by Mara Shapiro from Momfaze first appeared on BonBon Break.

The Biggest Mistake a Mom Can Make on the Internet

~:: Momfaze ::~

If your kids are online, hopefully, so are you. Social media is a great way for a savvy mom know what her teens are up to, earning her the well-deserved moniker ‘Mom Stalker’.  Just so you know, in today’s world of the Internet, stalking doesn’t necessarily have a negative connotation. If used wisely, of course. Because Mom stalking has it’s own occupational hazards as one momfazer very quickly found out. With her unwise actions she very nearly jeopardized her ability to easily view what her teenage daughter was doing online. Read on to see how she tipped over the precipice and almost lost her window into her daughter’s life.

ABOUT MOMFAZE: Toronto freelance writer/editor Randi Chapnik Myers and social communicator Mara Shapiro blog for momfaze, a no-holds-barred site for parents of teens and tweens. Randi, who also writes for Today’s Parent, More magazine and the Globe & Mail, is proud to be an expert carpooler, a reluctant chef, and a hockey mom at StixandPux. Mara, a Community Manager for Our Kids Media and book reviewer on Be Nice or Leave Thanks, has a hard time wiping the smile off her face while trying to perfect the art of saying No to her three teenagers.

Follow them at www.momfaze.com and on Twitter @momfaze as they stalk their kids online and live to write about it.

CONTINUE READING IN THE FAMILY ROOM

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The post The Biggest Mistake a Mom Can Make on the Internet by Momfaze first appeared on BonBon Break.

Stupid Things Teens Do

~:: momfaze ::~

When our kids were young, we taught them, step by step, to stay safe. Touch stove, get burned. Don’t look, get hit by car. We were banking on the fact that eventually all that good sense, which boils down to DON’T DO ANYTHING STUPID, would sink in. It did, of course. But then they turned teen. And now all they want is space to experiment. No try, no learn. So what’s a mom to do?

ABOUT MOMFAZE: Toronto freelance writer/editor Randi Chapnik Myers and social communicator Mara Shapiro blog for momfaze, a no-holds-barred site for parents of teens and tweens. Randi, who also writes for Today’s Parent, More magazine and the Globe & Mail, is proud to be an expert carpooler, a reluctant chef, and a hockey mom at StixandPux. Mara, a Community Manager for Our Kids Media and book reviewer on Be Nice or Leave Thanks, has a hard time wiping the smile off her face while trying to perfect the art of saying No to her three teenagers.

Follow them at www.momfaze.com and on Twitter @momfaze as they stalk their kids online and live to write about it.

CONTINUE READING IN THE FAMILY ROOM

The post Stupid Things Teens Do by Randi Chapnik Myers of momfaze first appeared on BonBon Break.

~:: Momfaze ::~

When I had my first child I fought the Minivan. Then, I had another, and another. I started to carpool, haul sports equipment, vast amounts of groceries, and god knows what else. I became attached to the Minivan and what it symbolized: motherhood, family, good times. Then, it happened. The teenagers started to grow up. No more carpools, no more hauling. And the question arose: Was it time to give up the Minivan?

ABOUT MOMFAZE: Toronto freelance writer/editor Randi Chapnik Myers and social communicator Mara Shapiro blog for momfaze, a no-holds-barred site for parents of teens and tweens. Randi, who also writes for Today’s Parent, More magazine and the Globe & Mail, is proud to be an expert carpooler, a reluctant chef, and a hockey mom at StixandPux. Mara, a Community Manager for Our Kids Media and book reviewer on Be Nice or Leave Thanks, has a hard time wiping the smile off her face while trying to perfect the art of saying No to her three teenagers.

Follow them at www.momfaze.com and on Twitter @momfaze as they stalk their kids online and live to write about it.

CONTINUE READING IN THE BEDROOM

The post Is it Time to Give Up the Minivan? by Momfaze first appeared on BonBon Break.

4 Tips for Putting the HO-HO-HO in Holiday Road Trips

~:: Karen Dawkins of Family Travels on a Budget ::~

~::: CONTINUE READING THIS POST :::~

ABOUT KAREN: Karen and her family have learned the art of enjoying the travel experience. She shares humorous anecdotes from her own experiences and uses them to equip the reader to travel better. At Family Travels on a Budget, she helps readers plan, budget and experience their vacation dreams.

You can follow Karen’s travel advice on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and Google +.

I Am Rubber and You’re Glue…

~:: Perspective Parenting ::~

You know those priceless teachable moments we have as parents where you want to swoop in and show them the way? Like when your child discovers the fact that not everyone will always be nice to them. You want to protect them and tell them that people are mean and they are wonderful, but if you are focusing on reality, they need to learn the truth…communication is a two way street.

 

~:::CONTINUE READING THIS POST:::~

 

 

 

ABOUT LYNN: She  is a mother of 2 young children and a professional school counselor to adolescents. She shares her perspectives regularly on everyday parenting concerns based on professional counseling experience fused with personal parenting experiences, using a blend of humor and reality.

You can follow Lynn on Facebook and Twitter.

 

Will Your Teenager Call When She Needs Help?

~:: Momfaze ::~

If your teen was in trouble, would she call for help?

It was just another lazy Saturday night in when the phone rang. Actually, I missed the call on my cell first, then it rang.

When a phone call starts a story, you know something big is about to go down. The truth is, I was half-expecting this call to come on some Saturday night someday. I just didn’t expect it tonight.

It was my 14-year-old daughter. Something had to be wrong because otherwise, she would text.

~:::CONTINUE READING THIS POST:::~

 

ABOUT MOMFAZE: Toronto freelance writer/editor Randi Chapnik Myers and social communicator Mara Shapiro blog for momfaze, a no-holds-barred site for parents of teens and tweens. Randi, who also writes for Today’s Parent, More magazine and the Globe & Mail, is proud to be an expert carpooler, a reluctant chef, and a hockey mom at StixandPux. Mara, a Community Manager for Our Kids Media and book reviewer on Be Nice or Leave Thanks, has a hard time wiping the smile off her face while trying to perfect the art of saying No to her three teenagers.

 

Follow them at www.momfaze.com and on Twitter @momfaze as they stalk their kids online and live to write about it.

The post Road Trips, Self-esteem, Teen Trust & Mommy-Daughter Dates first appeared on BonBon Break.

BE PREPARED: IT’S MORE THAN A BOY SCOUT MOTTO ::: Family Travel on a Budget

A few years ago, my siblings and I sent our parents on vacation to a relaxing resort on the South Carolina coast, a foodie paradise. We booked the trip for early spring, before the hot, sticky humidity dampened everything. For my parents, who love dining out and visiting historic places like old southern plantations but aren’t so keen on swimming pools and water slides, this should have been the perfect trip.

~~::Continue Reading::~~

About Karen: Karen and her family have learned the art of enjoying the travel experience. She shares humorous anecdotes from her own experiences and uses them to equip the reader to travel better. Her blogoffers: Step-by-step “how to’s” for each element of the vacation planning process, practical advice on how to evaluate options in light of your family’s needs, wish-lists, and finances, and destination-specific planning aids. You can follow Karen’s travel advice onFacebook & Twitter.

Kindergarten’s First Day ::: Baby by the Sea

~~::Continue Reading::~~

About Jennifer: Jennifer Beck Furber is a poet, a playwright, a School Board member, and a mama to three blond daughters: Betty Rose, Lucy May, and Olive June. She and her lineman husband love power lines, skiing with their girls and making s’mores on their sailboat. Her poetry and essays have been widely published, but it’s the 3rd place in a Mussel Eating Contest that really makes her smile. You can read all about life on the tiny Washington State island they call home at her poetic and photography-filled blog Baby by the Sea.

You can follow Jenn on Facebook and Instagram.

STUPID THINGS TEENS DO ::: momfaze

When our kids were young, we taught them, step by step, to stay safe. Touch stove, get burned. Don’t look, get hit by car. We were banking on the fact that eventually all that good sense, which boils down to DON’T DO ANYTHING STUPID, would sink in. It did, of course. But then they turned teen. And now all they want is space to experiment. No try, no learn. So what’s a mom to do?

Follow them at www.momfaze.com and on Twitter @momfaze as they stalk their kids online and live to write about it.

ADVENTURES IN PEDIATRICS::: The Nitty Gritty Mommy

Having three preschoolers means you get to see your pediatrician, a lot. When two of them were preemies and seem to have a nitch for catching every virus which is within a 50 foot radius, and are asthmatic, you get to visit even more. And when you have no family within 500 miles and your husband works 45 minutes away you get to take all three to the doctor, even if only one is sick.

It’s fun stuff..here’s how it goes.

~~::Continue Reading::~~

About Jennifer: Jennifer is a mother of three preschoolers, twin boys and a daughter just 19 months younger. Her life is wonderful and messy and funny and chaotic. She blogs about it at www.thenittygrittymommy.blogspot.com

She has been married to her husband Dave for over 10 years and is a stay at home mom who loves to read and write in her (limited) spare time. Jennifer can also be found on Facebook.

The post Family Room August 20 2012 first appeared on BonBon Break.